(Photo taken by Elizabeth K Photography)
Instead of life lessons, I bring you wife lessons! It’s essentially the same thing but it pertains to my lessons learned as a married woman. I’ve decided to become more reflective on my marriage and constantly look for ways to improve. And lucky for you guys I’ll share one wife lesson a month!
Wife Lesson 1 – Selflessness
This one is a tough one. I struggle with this one every day. This month I truly feel that God is trying to show me the importance of selflessness. It comes with its perks too! I’ll tell you more about that later.
I learned my first lesson on selfless actions when Eric was diagnosed with tongue cancer in 2010. We just bought a house, got engaged, and now we are battling with cancer. That’s a lot to take on in literally a month’s time. Eric, who never smoked, went through surgery and was constrained to a hospital bed for five days. That is five nights of me sleeping in a super uncomfortable hospital chair by his side as much as possible.
After being released from the hospital, he spent the next several weeks stuck in our new house and only able to eat liquid foods. He lost 30 pounds through this whole event. Him being home meant nurse Amanda 24/7 while still trying to perform work tasks for my full-time job. It was exhausting to the point of crying at times, but I wouldn’t trade those days for anything. Because of our hard time we became a stronger couple. He was so grateful for my never-ending dedication to his health and I in turn knew that he would do the same for me.
And yet here we are with the same lesson to learn. Sometimes it’s easier to be selfless when life calls you to do so. It’s harder to stay selfless when you don’t have to. Especially in the self-centered world that we live in. I’m learning to be more mindful of Eric’s daily needs and in turn he is becoming more mindful of mine.
I’m learning to cook dinner without complaints (after work it sucks sometimes because you are so tired). In return, Eric took me out to dinner on Friday in thanks for providing meals every night during the week. I love me some Cantina 1511 margaritas! 🙂 I’m more willing to walk Bailey even when it’s cold and raining because Eric is not feeling well (this is a big deal to me as I hate cold weather almost as much as I hate rain). And in turn Eric tells me how thankful he is for the things I do. He does laundry when I don’t even ask him. We both have become more giving and less demanding.
The other night I made breakfast for dinner. We were supposed to have shrimp but he wasn’t feeling well and shrimp did not sound appetizing. He opted for just a grilled cheese sandwich. Instead I decided to make eggs, veggie sausage, and homemade biscuits from scratch. Dinner turned out to be just what the doctor ordered. He thanked me after dinner, said I love you, and gave me a kiss. That for me is the best reward any girl could ask for. 🙂
So long story short: find ways to put your husbands needs before your own and see the difference it can make in your marriage. I know it has already begun to change mine in just a few weeks.